But then I realized not one of our five kids wears a watch! They all use their cell phones to tell time.
Like the home landlines and CDs, do you think we will see a decline of time-bearing accessories?
Major tragedy! What will we do when we’re running late and need to send a hint to loquacious acquaintances or verbose salesperson in the kiosks at the mall? Is our only immunity to glance at our phones? But how will our time-assaulting assailants know we’re running late and not just reading a text from Aunt Carol about mochi-making day or an email from Chase that my payment was received?
As I see it, the only defense we now have is our thoughtful SIRI. Instead of looking at a nonexistent watch on my wrist, she can broadcast a reminder: “You are five minutes late for your next appointment.” (Is there a hotkey for that?) Imagine the possibilities:
-Creepy guy at the nightclub wants your number – SIRI: “READING TEXT FROM SEXY SURFER DUDE – CAN I BUY YOU A DRINK?”
-Your mom wants you to come over for dinner – SIRI: “YOU HAVE 12 EVENTS PENDING. SHALL I SCHEDULE THEM NOW?”
-Waiting in queue at a department store – SIRI: “FOUND: SAME DRESS ON SALE AT NORDSTROM’S 40% OFF.”
-long-winded meeting with an ex-spouse – SIRI: READING TEXT FROM [insert name(s) here] – YOU ARE PERFECT FOR ME. NEVER WANT TO LET YOU GO.
Okay, so maybe these are not so subtle hints for running late or creating other excuses, but watcha’ girl going to do?